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i was going through all these trials, and that’s when i thought, “i’m not ready to die.” and i was like, “i need to believe in something. i need to believe in god.” and at that time, i found a man that he was very community oriented, and he ran a youth group, and he hosted bible study nights, and i found people that i could relate with. i could connect with and pray with. i was allowed to be at a place where people and god could come together to work.

i would say that there is a lot of room for us to help each other out. i think that there is a lot of people that need the help. i think it’s just like the old saying, “the world needs a happy ending.” we’re going through a stressful and sad world. people need a little peace and joy.

i encourage anyone to step outside of that routine lifestyle, and find that person that you can tell the truth to. if you share a struggle, you can share that. you can share that. you can share your battle, you can share your family, you can share what you’re going through.

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this testimony is much like mine. my dad left me, and my mom never recovered. i had found what i was looking for – my dad. but my mom was a long process of anger and depression of course, but over time she turned to religion, and found people that helped her. i started to see her as a completely different person. people around me were like, “where’s my mom? she was just here yesterday.” but the religious people i grew up around said, “she’s there, she’s there, she’s there.” they had the answers, and they had the trust of the departed. i began to feel like i needed it too. it was kind of like a cleansing. i started to feel like i was living in hell. and i was like, “i’m going to live a different life, and i’m going to make it right.”
at first, i was pretty confused. i felt like i was led to a train track, and i had to get on the train. and now i’m going to live a happy life. it was a fresh start. i started reading the bible. i wanted to know the truth. and i started going to church more, and i started praying more. and i started to get closer to god. i started to realize that it’s okay if you don’t have all the answers. god will guide you through the process of discovery. just do your best and ask for help.
i look back on what we went through. my mother got very sick. my father left the house. my mother didn’t go to church. i started to have problems at school. i was out of control and felt like i needed to make things right. i felt like i had a void of sorts in my life that god could help me fix. i had lost everything. i got so sick of myself that i had to do something. and i prayed for guidance. and that’s when the spiritual police started. i was like, “what is going on here? why am i having to do this?” that’s when i felt like they were just pulling me towards christianity.

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